Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Classified Humor

You've all probably seen these -- I had, but they're still funny and on this gray, wet day I can always use a smile.

These classifieds actually ran in a Minneapolis newspaper –

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8-years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites!

FREE PUPPIES:
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog..

FREE PUPPIES..
Mother, AKC German Shepherd.
Father, Super Dog. able to leap tall fences in a single bound..

FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG.
Looks like a rat. Been out a while. Better be a big reward.

COWS: NEVER BRED.
Also 1 gay bull for sale..

NORDIC TRACK
$300 Hardly used, call Chubby.

GEORGIA PEACHES
California grown - 89 cents/lb.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer $300.

WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE .
Worn once by mistake. Call Stephanie.

And the best one?:

FOR SALE BY OWNER:
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000 or best offer. No longer needed, Got married last month. Wife knows everything!

And how is this one for "typical human thinking"!

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16 comments:

  1. Annie JeffriesDecember 30, 2009 at 9:31 AM

    You had me laughing outloud this morning, Sylvia. The family must thinkk I'm demented. Love the doggie ads.

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  2. Martha ZDecember 30, 2009 at 9:35 AM

    It's always nice to have a smile to brighten up a gray day. It is gray here in the Sacramento area as well.

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  3. UnknownDecember 30, 2009 at 9:46 AM

    Heheh. No one's ever happy with what they have.

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  4. AnonymousDecember 30, 2009 at 11:01 AM

    omg PhQB you have outdone yourself. That wedding dress one is HYSTERICAL but my absolute FAV is the Yorkshire Terrier. I just fell over backwards on that one. These are just tooooo funny. You made my day :)

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  5. Gerald (SK14)December 30, 2009 at 11:04 AM

    I haven't heard them ALL before so they cheered me up.

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  6. bobbieDecember 30, 2009 at 11:28 AM

    All good ones!

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  7. Bradley HsiDecember 30, 2009 at 11:35 AM

    Love the humur, quite fun!! Happy New Year.

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  8. JayDecember 30, 2009 at 12:22 PM

    'Puppies: Half Cocker Spaniel, half sneaky neighbour's dog'

    HAHAHAHAHA!!! That's so funny! Actually they're all funny, but that's the one that made me laugh out loud!

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  9. EcoRoverDecember 30, 2009 at 12:30 PM

    Great ads. Having had friends with a beastly Yorkie, I especially sympathize with that.

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  10. Susan at Stony RiverDecember 30, 2009 at 12:54 PM

    Stephanie's dress and the super dog had me laughing out loud--and yes, the cartoon has people nailed! LOL

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  11. SunnyDecember 30, 2009 at 3:11 PM

    These can't help but make you laugh out loud. Thanks I need that!
    Sunny :)

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  12. Elizabeth BradleyDecember 30, 2009 at 4:07 PM

    It's gray here to, I needed a good laugh, thanks!

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  13. magiceyeDecember 30, 2009 at 8:16 PM

    brilliant laughs! thank you

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  14. IngridDecember 30, 2009 at 10:14 PM

    Hahaha ! exactly what I need to start the day !

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  15. chrome3dJanuary 1, 2010 at 8:30 AM

    Gay bulls must have a hard time.

    Wife knows everything! ...yeah, she does...

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  16. KayJanuary 1, 2010 at 6:05 PM

    Aaaack! I have that Nordic Trak!

    ReplyDelete

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