Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Male and Female Humor

Male or Female? You might not have known this, but a lot of non-living objects are actually either male or female. Here are some examples:

FREEZER BAGS:
They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

PHOTOCOPIERS:
These are female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong Buttons.

TIRES:
Tires are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated.

HOT AIR BALLOONS:
Also a male object, because to get them to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under their butt.

SPONGES:
These are female, because they are soft, squeezable and retain water.

WEB PAGES:
Female, because they're constantly being looked at and frequently getting hit on.

TRAINS:
Definitely male, because they always use the same old lines for picking up people.

EGG TIMERS:
Egg timers are female because, over time, all the weight shifts to the bottom.

HAMMERS:
Male, because in the last 5000 years, they've hardly changed at all, and are occasionally handy to have around.

THE REMOTE CONTROL:
Female. Ha! You probably thought it would be male, but consider this: It easily gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know which buttons to push, he just keeps trying.

New Law:

With the high rate of attacks on women in secluded parking lots, especially during evening hours, the Minneapolis City Council has established a 'Women Only' parking lot at the Mall of America. Even the parking lot attendants are exclusively female so that a comfortable and safe environment is created for patrons.

Below is the first picture available of this world-first women-only parking lot in Minnesota .



Obviously this was planned and photographed by the man who was pissed off when he discovered the Hammer was male!

6 comments:

  1. These are a riot! And, I love that parking lot...what a hoot!

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  2. Oooh PhQB you started my day off with a great laugh. I love it. I'm staying quiet about the parking lot LOL Too funny. Have a great day my friend :)

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  3. love it!! Only the one about the egg timer stymied me...did you mean egg?!

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  4. Oh too too funny, Sylvia! I loved this. It sure did give me a lovely Saturday chuckle.

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  5. As a fantastic driver myself - middle name Schumacher - I have to disagree with the last joke... let me park somewhere first and then share my reason... screech... bang!

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  6. Love the parking lot, Sylvia. I left your Prokofiev music on while I went about my business blogging! thank you! :)

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