I miss you Sam!!

I miss you Sam!!
I miss you Sam!!

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Some After Easter Humor

Good Samaritan
A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of the Good Samaritan. She asked the class, "If you saw a person lying on the roadside, all wounded and bleeding, what would you do?"
A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, "I think I'd throw up."

Did Noah Fish? 
Another Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot fishing when he was on the Ark?"

"No," replied Johnny. "How could he -- he just had two worms."

The Lord is My Shepherd 
A Sunday School teacher de4cided to have her young class memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible - Psalm 23.  She gave the youngsters a month to learn the chapter.  Little Rick was excited about the task - but he just couldn't remember the Psalm. After much practice, he could barely get past the first line. On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation Ricky was so nervous that when it was his turn, he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my Shepherd and that's all I need to know."

Unanswered Prayer
The preachers 5 year old daughter noticed that her father always paused before starting his sermon.  One day she asked him why???
"Well, Honey," he began, proud that his daughter was so observant of his messages.
"I'm asking the Lord to help me preach a good sermon."
"How come he doesn't answer it??" She asked.

Being Thankful
A Rabbi said to a precocious six-year old boy, "So your mother says your prayers for you each night? That's very commendable. What does she say?"
The little boy replied, "Thank God he's in bed!"

All Men/All Girls
When my daughter, Kelli, said her bedtime prayers, she would bless every family member, every friend, and every animal (current and past). For several weeks after we had finished the nightly prayer, Kelli would say, "And all girls."
This soon became part of her nightly routine, to include this closing. My curiosity got the best of me and I asked her, "Kelli, why do you always add the part about all girls?"

Her response was, "Because everybody always finish their prayers by saying "All Men!!"

Say a Prayer
Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday dinner at his Grandmother's house. Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served. When Little Johnny received his plate, he started eating right away.  "Johnny! Please wait until we say our prayer," said his mother.
"I don't need to," the boy replied.
"Of course, you do," his mother insisted.  "We always say a prayer before eating at our house."
"That's at our house," Johnny explained. "But this is Grandma's house and she knows how to cook."


Andrea Priebe said...

Oh, Sylvia ... out of the mouths of babes ... I enjoyed this immensely as I do enjoy all of your posts even though I don't often have time to comment. I hope the Simians have more luck than the humans seem to. It seems war, to at least some(you know who you are), is a way of life and also a way of supporting the arms dealers. Go for it Simians!

Andrea @ From The Sol

TexWisGirl said...

loved the 'two worms'. :)

PerthDailyPhoto said...

Loved them all but Being Thankful made me lol, merci beaucoup Sylvia.

Fotolosopher said...

Thanks, Sylvia, for these...I've been thinking of the sad state of affairs that defines our country and I needed a laugh! :)

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari OM
True upliftment!!! YAM xx

George said...

Thanks for the smiles. We never know for sure what our little ones are going to say.

EG CameraGirl said...

Kids truly do say the darndest things!

Mama Zen said...

We could all learn a lot from little Ricky!

magiceye said...

lol!! They were hilarious!!

Indrani said...

Thanks for the laugh! I liked the last one the most. :D

Michael Scofield said...

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What Can I Say?

What Can I Say?
I'm interested in almost everything. Use to like to travel, but it's too expensive now. I take Tai Chi classes, swim, volunteer in a Jump-start program for pre-schoolers. I'm an avid reader and like nearly everyone these days I follow politics avidly. I'm a former teacher and Special Projects Coordinator for a Telecommunications company, Assistant to the President of a Japanese silicon wafer manufacturing company. Am now enjoying retirement -- most of the time. I have two daughters, one son-in-law and two sons scattered all over the country. No grandchildren.

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