I miss you Sam!!

I miss you Sam!!
I miss you Sam!!

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

How About a Laugh to Start the Day?


A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room
when a young woman with purple hair styled
into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting  a variety
of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing,
entered . . . It  was quickly determined that
the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was
scheduled for immediate surgery.. When she was completely disrobed on the operating
table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had
been dyed green and above it there was a
tattoo that read . . . 'Keep off the grass.'


Once the surgery was completed, the surgeon
wrote a short note on the patient's dressing,
which said 'Sorry . . . had to  mow the lawn.'

Submitted by RN no name,
         

                   
  As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB.
 
I was quite embarrassed when performing female
pelvic exams... To cover my embarrassment
I had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly.

The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassing me.

I looked up from my work and sheepishly said.  . ..
I'm sorry. Was I tickling you? ' 
She replied with tears running down
her cheeks from laughing so hard . . .

'No doctor but the song you were whistling was . . ...
' I wish I was an Oscar Mayer Wiener .'

  Dr. wouldn't submit his name.....


Baby's First Doctor Visit


A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the
doctor to come in for the baby's first exam.
The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed.
'Breast-fed, ' she replied..

' Well, strip down to your waist,' the doctor ordered.

She did. He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very professional and detailed examination.

Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said,  'No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk.'

‘I know,' she said,  'I'm his Grandma,

But I'm glad I came.’


12 comments:

PerthDailyPhoto said...

Still laughing Sylvia, that last one was a gem!!

Maude Lynn said...

That last one is hilarious!

Francisca said...

Funny, Sylvia! As I rule, I go to female doctors, but it sure would crack me up to have a male examiner whistling "Oscar Mayer Wiener..." I'm afraid you've stuck me with an earworm now! LOL!

TexWisGirl said...

UGH!

Roshni said...

hahahha!!! Love all of them!

Sue McPeak said...

Thank you for the LOL!!! All good ones. Sure makes me glad I go to a Lady Doc. I'll be much more aware when taking my grandson to the doctor, too! Have a great Thanksgiving.

George said...

It has turned dark and the day is ending, but this is still great laughter.

Jack said...

Outstanding, Sylvia. I am trying to think who I can tell without getting sued.

Leovi said...

JA, Ja, Ja. Fun. Saludos.

Unknown said...

lovely...esp the last one :D

hope ur having a lovely week!

cheers,
My Third Eye

Cildemer said...

Loved the first and the last, but I'm afraid I didn't understand n° 2 because of my lack of American culture! Simply don't know what ' I wish I was an Oscar Mayer Wiener' is. Will have to ask Mr Google;o)

Thanks for making me laugh, my friend;o)

***
Hugs****

Kay said...

Oh my heavens! These are hilarious!

What Can I Say?

What Can I Say?
I'm interested in almost everything. Use to like to travel, but it's too expensive now. I take Tai Chi classes, swim, volunteer in a Jump-start program for pre-schoolers. I'm an avid reader and like nearly everyone these days I follow politics avidly. I'm a former teacher and Special Projects Coordinator for a Telecommunications company, Assistant to the President of a Japanese silicon wafer manufacturing company. Am now enjoying retirement -- most of the time. I have two daughters, one son-in-law and two sons scattered all over the country. No grandchildren.

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