I miss you Sam!!

I miss you Sam!!
I miss you Sam!!

Friday, July 5, 2013

PONDERISMS -- (something to think about for the weekend)


1- I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.
 

2- There are two kinds of pedestrians . . . The quick and the dead.

 
3- Life is sexually transmitted.

 
4- Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

 
5- The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

 
6- Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

 
7- Have you noticed since everyone has a cell phone these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?

 
8- Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

 
9- All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

 
10- In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

 
11- How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

 
12- Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things and drink whatever comes out'? Hmmmmm, How about eggs ? . . .

 
13- If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

 
14- Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

 
16- If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

 
17- Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

 
18- Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

 
19- Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

10 comments:

Sylvia K said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Yamini MacLean said...

Hari Om
...and now I am pondering how Andrea has posted comment under your name!! There are some goodies in here - thanks for the smiles! YAM xx

Karen said...

Very ponderable Sylvia! 2 and 10 cracked me up! Have a great weekend!

Sylvia K said...

I had to cut and paste Andrea's comment, so it looks like my own??? Another screwy day on Blogger????

Andrea has left a new comment on your post "PONDERISMS -- (something to think about for the...":

I love it when you ponder ... I am laughing and saying "HUH?" at the same time. Cleverness is your middle name. Thanks Sylvia ... this day was starting out slow and boring ... No More:)

Andrea @ From The Sol


Wayne said...

Sylvia, I love your reflections and your ponderisms, enjoy your weekend!

TexWisGirl said...

health is simply the slowest rate to die. :)

Jack said...

There are some very witty sayings here, Sylvia. I hope I can remember them when they will fit into a conversation I am having. I will seem so bright and witty!

jabblog said...

Great ponderisms (what a lovely word!)

PerthDailyPhoto said...

Haha! No 8 applies this weekend Sylvia, who's got time to breath :))

magiceye said...

Now you have given me a lot to think for the weekend!!
Shall share it with due credit to you.

What Can I Say?

What Can I Say?
I'm interested in almost everything. Use to like to travel, but it's too expensive now. I take Tai Chi classes, swim, volunteer in a Jump-start program for pre-schoolers. I'm an avid reader and like nearly everyone these days I follow politics avidly. I'm a former teacher and Special Projects Coordinator for a Telecommunications company, Assistant to the President of a Japanese silicon wafer manufacturing company. Am now enjoying retirement -- most of the time. I have two daughters, one son-in-law and two sons scattered all over the country. No grandchildren.

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