Looking Back - Part 15 - Childhood Summers in Hico

I will be out of town most of this week in order to attend a family reunion in Houston, Texas. When I first learned that the remaining cousins in my family were planning to get together this month, I felt somewhat sad that I wouldn't be able to join them, but it would just have been too expensive a trip for me to make at this time. When one of my cousins discovered I would be unable to come, she made airline reservations for me so that I could join them. Consequently, I won't be posting except the Evening Thoughts, which I have scheduled, until the end of the week when I return to Seattle and I won't be able to comment on your posts, but I'll try to make up for it when I return and I'll have photos to share.

The memories that have been stirred by the impending trip have been both happy and poignant.

Memories of my childhood, of summers in Hico, Texas.

In case you’re wondering, Hico is a very small town in Hamilton County, Texas. It was founded in 1856. According to early day reports, by 1907, more cotton was bought right off wagons on the main street than in any town in the world. But I digress, my grandparents lived in Hico for many, many years and as a child I spent much time there. There were some Christmases with the entire family of aunts and uncles and cousins. I always loved those holidays because my grandparent’s house had a fireplace! I knew for sure that Santa Claus couldn’t miss that and I was confident there would be even more presents that year.



My grandparents old house today and as it was many years ago when my father and his siblings were young.



But the most vivid memories are the summers that I spent there with my cousin, Jane Ann, who was a couple of years younger, but who shared the same love of paper dolls that I did. Now back then you didn’t buy paper dolls at a toy store, you cut them out of pattern books that you could find in the fabric section of what passed for department stores in those days.

Hico was a very small town and our grandparent’s big, old house was close enough for us to be able to walk to town. Within a day or two of our arrival, Jane Ann and I would walk downtown, first to the post office to visit with Thoma, a lovely lady who worked there and who took the mail from our grandparent’s mail box for us to carry home. She nearly always had a treat for us as well. Our main goal, however, was the store where we knew there might be an extra pattern book or two from the past month that one of the clerks would have kept under the counter just for the likes of us – our grandmother kept them informed of our visits. But before we carried the heavy pattern books home, we stopped by the local drug store to have an ice cream cone, it was always fun to climb up on the tall stools at the counter and watch the man who worked there load up the cones with, what we were sure was the best ice cream in the world. Then, with ice cream smeared faces, we would head for Mama’s house with the pattern book. And if we were lucky we might even be able to find a wallpaper sample book that we liked to use to make furniture for the paper dolls.

We would spend days, cutting out dozens of ladies and men and children from the pattern book. We always had large families – Jane Ann had an older brother, but I was an only child. I wanted lots of children in my paper family – I carried that desire on to my real family many years later.

We played for hours on the floor of the living room there in my grandparent’s house. Sometimes we argued over who was to get a particular paper doll and sometimes those arguments resulted in tears. I do remember one summer when I finally succeeded in getting a prized paper doll much to the disappointment of Jane Ann. Later that year when I learned that she had injured her arm, I felt so badly that I had my mother put the disputed paper doll in an envelope and send it to Jane Ann.

The memories of those summers still play out quite vividly in my mind. The sound of the crickets and the birds in the trees that surrounded the house and could be heard so clearly as we lay in our beds on the screened-in sleeping porch. That porch was where we all slept in the summer as there was no air conditioning at that time and, as always -- then and now, summers in Texas were HOT! I can clearly remember watching my Grandfather milking the cow in the evenings; running up and down along the fence to the small pasture playing with a young calf, poking grass through the wire for him to wrap his long tongue around.

Lovely memories, made even more dear since I was able to reconnect with, not only Jane Ann, but four of my cousins, their husbands and wife. They came from all over Texas to Dallas where I was visiting my oldest son, David. I hadn’t seen most of them in over thirty years and it was the most fun ever. We met at David’s new house – so new that there was no furniture to speak of and they all brought lawn chairs and we sat around his big empty den and laughed and remembered and ate pizza.

Celebrating memories at my son's house in Dallas.



As I said earlier these are very poignant memories for me these days because the husband of my cousin, Laura, died this past year of cancer and Jane Ann was diagnosed with breast cancer earlier this year and Laura's brother John has also been diagnosed with cancer recently.

How blessed we all are to have the beautiful, happy -- and poignant memories to share and to look back upon.

Looking Back - Part 14 - Another Birthday

Hard to believe that another birthday has arrived -- I'm not sure, but I feel as though I've been having two birthdays a year since I turned 70! How else is it possible that I have gotten this old, this quickly!!

Birthdays have never been particularly important or even interesting for me except when my children were growing up. We did celebrate grandly then with everyone getting some kind of goody that I had made for them -- with four it was a lot less expensive to make the gifts and I did make everything from clothes to toys. And it was even more fun for me, making everyone a special gift. The birthday boy or girl got a stack of goodies, but the others each got one special gift. As a result they all looked forward to each other’s birthdays and it was great fun. My youngest daughter paid me back a couple of years ago when my sons were in Portland for their birthdays and she sent presents for all of us. That was a grand surprise.

However, at my current age, for the most part the only good thing about birthdays is that I’m still around to celebrate one at all. My kids seem to feel pretty much the same way about theirs and other than a call to say “I love you”, we pretty much let them slide by without a lot of hoohah. So when I was taking a writing class a few years ago, one of our assignments was to write about our birthday. I kind of sat staring at my computer screen, hoping some marvelous inspiration would float down and invade my thoughts. When nothing happened and the week was nearly gone, I decided to take a look at the websites that had been included with our instructions.

I discovered that P. B. Shelley and Louie Armstrong had both been born on August 4, too, and I wondered why the same muse wasn’t hovering over my shoulder. There were a number of football players, but that didn’t offer any particular inspiration. Then when I looked at events that had occurred on my birthday, I saw momentous things like Howard Stern withdrawing from the New York gubernatorial race and a truck carrying millions of bees overturning on a New York parkway. Amazing! As I scrolled down the page I saw a name that I knew! Kathy Whitworth, a girl who was born in the small west Texas town where I grew up and whom I had gone to school with! I surfed around and discovered she was among the world’s first leading women golfers and had won one of her first prestigious tournaments on my birthday! I’m pretty sure she didn’t plan it that way though.

I also discovered that while warming up before the 5th inning Yankee Dave Winfield accidentally killed a seagull! And Prince’s album Purple Rain went to #1. Carl Lewis won a gold medal in the 100-meter dash in the summer Olympics in Los Angeles and France performed a nuclear test. John Lennon and Yoko began recording “Double Fantasy”, Oliver North was assigned to White House duty and President Carter established the Department of Energy. Anne Frank was arrested in Amsterdam by the Nazis and the first train of Jews departed for Auschwitz from Mechelen, Belgium. And Dom Perignon invented champagne. And all on my birth date – August 4!

The assignment had turned into an intriguing one, a great history lesson -- and a chance to observe and reflect on the funny, mundane, tragic and everything in between that has taken place on just this one day in history. An opportunity to become aware of so much more than just a birthday, but a date to be celebrated and cherished as each day of all our lives should be.

Last year my birthday turned from the usual quiet day to an incredible one when my son, Adam, surprised me with an incredible seaplane flight over the entire Seattle area! And it was breathtaking! I even got to sit in the co-pilot's seat and had the most incredible view of all!

So, while I've been preparing for the upcoming day, I took a look back at me and this was what I came up with to celebrate my birthday on this August 4. A day that I will be celebrating with three of my children -- David is coming from Dallas, Kerith from Santa Rosa and, of course, Adam.

Sylvia Rae McCarty Kirkwood
My mother admired the actress, Sylvia Sidney.
My father’s name was Raymond – he wanted a boy.
Irish, skinny, freckled, too-curly auburn hair,
My relatives called me Priss, that says it all,
I was a feisty, prissy little girl,
But neither family nor relatives ever knew
The other little girl under the curls,
Or the hurts she kept hidden.
Then it was Bucky, at least until the braces went on and came off.
Kirkwood symboled a new woman, married to the Olympic hero,
Sylvia disappeared behind him, became Ninkles – no, don’t ask.
Ah, but then came the real gifts!
Four beautiful gifts that encompassed the best of both
The hero and the prissy, feisty girl.
Now the hair is white, but the feisty remains,
Hopefully less prissy, but not less spirited.
A journey through the names tells the story,
My story, and what a great story it’s been!

Looking Back - Part 13 - A Great Opportunity - Never Too Late

In the early 1990’s I was living in Dallas, Texas – where I was born and had spent a good part of my life. I had moved back there in 1983 when my husband and I separated, but even after nearly ten years in Dallas I still missed the northwest and wanted to go back before I got too old to move at all, let alone across the country. I loved Montana where we had lived, where our children had grown up, but I knew the chances of finding a job that would do more than keep me off food stamps was probably next to impossible. So, I moved to Oregon, to Portland and fell in love with the city and with the state, with its incredible coast line and magnificent mountains. Now, the only question was, would I be able to find a job? I was just about to turn sixty. It was the early 90s and the economy in Portland at that time wasn’t the best.

I did find a job – finally, as office manager for a landscape architect’s two man business. Not the most promising employment for an old broad, but I had some money put back and I finally found an inexpensive little apartment belonging to one our contractors. I settled in to see where the fates would take me next.

After two years it became painfully obvious that I was not going to be able to prepare for my elder – more elderly years where I was, so I took another one of those deep breaths, handed in my resignation and I began searching for something with a little more future – even short termed future. I decided to work as a temp which would give me a better chance to check out the work environment before accepting a position and at the same time giving a company a chance to see what I could do -- which I was certain would land me what I was looking for -- whatever else, I was never short on confidence -- well, at least back then. The economy was in much better shape by then with numerous high tech companies moving into the area.

Things just felt right the first day of my first temp assignment. It was with a Japanese silicon wafer manufacturing company – an old company in Japan, a new venture in the US. They had been selling silicon wafers to computer companies for years and had finally decided that the time had come to build a plant in the US, manufacture the wafers, as well as have a sales office, engineering department – the works.

I was hired to handle the phones and the front desk of the small, crowded office space they were using while the new $450 million dollar plant was being constructed. But my time on the front desk was short. My boss came to me one day and told me he wanted the company to take part in a job fair and he needed someone to take it on as a project and would I be willing to do that. I was thrilled at the opportunity, for one thing, to get out from behind the front desk and the phones, two, to be able make the most of my several years of experience in the Public Relations department of GTE; now that could work for me at my new job with Komatsu. They had me hire a replacement for myself on the front desk and I went to work having a brochure designed, organizing space at the job fair and pulling it all together.

It was exciting and fulfilling because they left it totally in my hands, signed off on everything I requested. The Fair was very successful, and I received kudos from management. Two months later, when my temporary assignment was to end, the CEO called me in and offered me a permanent position as assistant to the new President and asked me how much I was looking for in regards to salary. It resulted in a great package deal for me and Komatsu's management was happy as well.

Looking back I have to say that other than the job with the Independent Living Project, that I wrote about in an earlier "Looking Back" piece, my job with Komatsu was the best, the most exciting, fun job I’ve ever had. I studied Japanese so I could at least be able to exchange greetings with the many executives and officers from the home office in Japan when they came for business trips. It was part of my job to help entertain them, so my days frequently were considerably longer than eight hours and I could have cared less. We had many Japanese engineers that arrived to help get the plant up and operating and I arranged housing for them all. At one apartment complex we took over one entire building of six apartments. Since this group worked round the clock, I turned one of the apartments into a clubhouse with two bedrooms turned into TV rooms and I hired a Japanese cook to prepare food for them. It worked out great for a bunch of guys working different shifts, 24/7.

For those moving from Japan on a more permanent basis, I rented other apartments, helped get their families settled in, find doctors, get their children enrolled in schools. Komatsu paid for all the day to day necessities such as dishes, towels, bedding, etc. I couldn't believe I was actually being paid to go shopping! Now, it doesn't get any better than that. Target loved to see me walk through the door! I was that gal that bought at least four of everything, every time I came to the store!

During those early months I also did the planning for parties, meetings, conferences and handled much of the publicity for the company at that time.

Gradually, as the positions were filled by permanent employees, those who had come from Japan earlier prepared to go home. I was able to take all of the things that I had purchased for the apartments and donate them to a battered woman's shelter in the area -- and that was a really "feel good" moment - for me and for the company.

One of the lovely things about the company was the fact they hired young and old – I wasn’t the only sixties person -- they hired people from many other countries – Russia, China, the US as well as Japan. And everyone seemed to feel the same excitement and enthusiasm at being involved with this new company. I was able to travel, to take classes in various aspects of the business that took me to San Francisco and Atlanta. And there was always a another chance to learn, to be involved.

We moved into the new building and it was magnificent! But isn’t it strange how things happen? Three years into this new project there was a big downturn in the Japanese economy -- it was 1999. It soon became obvious that we would have to cut back and numerous jobs were eliminated. I managed to survive that cut, but a little over three years after the exciting beginning, the plant was shut down. A $450 million dollar white elephant!

By that time I was sixty-seven and it was obvious even to me that my working days were about over. It was one of the most difficult times in my life. I wasn’t ready to stop or even slow down, but it was soon apparent that there was – is such a thing as age discrimination whether anyone wants to admit it or not.

So I took a deep breath, rented an apartment in San Miguel de Allende in Mexico and spent a fabulous year in the high dessert. In between lovely trips to all the historical cities in that beautiful part of Mexico, I nursed my hurts and disappointments very successfully. My daughter, Kerith and my son, David came down for Christmas that year and we had a fabulous holiday. I slipped into the 21st century that December 31 and watched the world celebrate the beginning of the year 2000.

I returned to Oregon a little over a year later and settled down to try and make the most of retirement and I had to admit that life was still good – different, but good.

And then the move to Seattle! Ah, change is good! Keeps you on your toes. It’s all in how you choose to see it.

Look Back - Part 12 - A Celebration for Today

Today is my youngest daughter’s forty-first birthday and I can remember that day as if it were yesterday. I was determined that this delivery would not be like the birth of my first child, Robyn -- I spent 36 hours in labor before she finally put in an appearance. She was beautiful and the baby I wasn't supposed to be able to have. My husband was in Vietnam and didn't see his first daughter until she was six months old. I promised myself that next time would be different.

So this time, when I began to have contractions and my husband wanted to take me to the hospital right away -- we were living in Madrid, Spain and the hospital was on the air base located twenty-two miles from our apartment near downtown Madrid -- I persuaded him to wait for a bit to make sure it wasn't a false alarm. Finally about nine o'clock that evening I decided it might be time to go. We parked the car in the parking lot at the hospital and then I insisted on walking until I had a contraction, then we'd wait until it passed, turn around and walk the other way until the next one came. When we were almost turning around in a circle, I decided it was time to go inside the hospital. My beautiful daughter, Kerith Elena Kirkwood, was born about an hour later.

Now, how could that possibly have been forty one years ago? Memories as clear and sharp as black and white photos. It was a great day then and it's a great day today.

Happy Birthday, my beautiful one!

TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED the 1930's 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's !!

For some reason I was unable to post my Sky Watch pictures today -- no idea why, but something squirrelly. So, as I was looking through some emails from friends I ran across this and it did strike a chord with me as I'm sure it will with many of you. Bet you never realized how tough we were -- are!

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes. Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints.We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.

As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, booster seats, seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat. We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle. We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this. We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank koolaid made with sugar, but we weren't overweight because WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING ! We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem. We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 150 channels on cable, no video movies or DVD's, no surround-sound or CD's, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or chat rooms....... WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them! We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents. We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.

We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes. We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them!

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!! The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law! These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever! The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL! If YOU are one of them . . CONGRATULATIONS!

You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives for our own good. And while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave (and lucky) their parents were.

Hmmm, kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it?