How Adam Got Eve
Adam was hanging around the garden of Eden feeling very lonely.
So, God asked him, What's wrong with you?
Adam said he didn't have anyone to talk to.
God said that He was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman.
He said, This pretty lady will gather food for you, she will cook for you,
and when you discover clothing, she will wash them for you.
She will always agree with every decision you make and she will not nag you.
And will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you've had a disagreement.
She will praise you!
She will bear your children.
And never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them.
She will NEVER have a headache and will freely give you love and
passion whenever you need it.
Adam asked God, 'What will a woman like this cost?'
'An arm and a leg.'
Then Adam asked, 'What can I get for a rib?'
Of course the rest is history...... ............!! !!
And this is history!
The Funeral Procession
A man was leaving a convenience store with his morning coffee when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery.
A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about
50 feet behind the first one.
Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a dog on a leash.
Behind him, a short distance back, were about 200 men walking single file.
The man couldn't stand the curiosity. He respectfully approached the man walking the dog and said, 'I am so sorry for your loss, and this may be a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this.
Whose funeral is it?'
'My wife's.
'What happened to her?'
The man replied, 'My dog attacked and killed her'
He inquired further, 'But who is in the second hearse?'
The man answered, 'My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog turned on her.'
A poignant and thoughtful moment of silence passed between the two men.
'Can I borrow the dog?'
The man replied, 'Get in line.'
Sylvia's world in thoughts and pictures
I miss you Sam!!
I miss you Sam!!
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What Can I Say?
I'm interested in almost everything. Use to like to travel, but it's too expensive now. I take Tai Chi classes, swim, volunteer in a Jump-start program for pre-schoolers. I'm an avid reader and like nearly everyone these days I follow politics avidly. I'm a former teacher and Special Projects Coordinator for a Telecommunications company, Assistant to the President of a Japanese silicon wafer manufacturing company. Am now enjoying retirement -- most of the time. I have two daughters, one son-in-law and two sons scattered all over the country. No grandchildren.
12 comments:
Thanks for a good laugh. Have a great day!
Sooo funny. Got my day off to a great start. :)
Funny stuff Sylvia, the Second one was great.
hahaha and hubs liked them too ;-)
Both made me smile. And I continue to be in awe of the sky images you capture on film.
ha,ha, great jokes! I'm glad to get back here to enjoy your sense of humor!
You come across so sweet and innocent most of the time but then the evilness just has to get out. I loved them both.
lol! that was fun!
Aaaaaaack! I'm going to have to show this to my husband.
wonderful!! Love the dog joke, of course!! Will send it to my dad...he loves sick humor!!
Arm and a leg might be too much, but yes yes, it should have been more than just a rib.
Very good, not too kind for women. Well, I must say Grace is worth more than a rib.
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