I miss you Sam!!

I miss you Sam!!
I miss you Sam!!

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Some Giggles and Laughs for Tuesday!!

His name is Dick
A sign of the times!!

And  for the women in the audience!
PREGNANCY Q & A & more!

 Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
 A: No, 35 children is enough.

 Q : I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
 A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

 Q : What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
 A: Childbirth.

 Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
 A: So what's your question?
 Q?: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
 A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.?

 Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
 A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

 Q?: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
 A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.

 Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
 A: Yes, pregnancy.

 Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
 A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

 Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
 A: When the kids are in college.

 "ESTROGEN ISSUES"
 10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"

 1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
 2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.
 3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
 4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
 5. You're using your cell phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says:
"How's my driving".
 6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
 7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space."
 9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
 10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.
 

10 comments:

Faylinn said...

What a lovely dog...

TexWisGirl said...

loved 'em all. :)

Betty Manousos@ Cut and Dry said...

too funny!
loved them all!

what a cute pup!

momto8 said...

haha love it!! thanks for AL the laughs!

Island Rambles Blog said...

Thanks for the laughs and cute doggie...sometimes it is just nice to read someone who is not serious and can laugh at things!

Linda Reeder said...

OMG, the dog! Quite the markings!

Betsy from Tennessee said...

Thanks for the great laughs, Sylvia.... Loved the Gasoline one.... TRUTH... Gads!!!
Hugs,
Betsy

Cher said...

hahaha, i can't stop giggling! you made my day, Sylvia! enjoy yours! :)

PerthDailyPhoto said...

Oh I needed these Sylvia. It's been a loooooong day, just sat down to the computer (it's 11pm here in Perth) but this cheered me up a lot!!

NixBlog said...

Great post, Sylvia! :-)

What Can I Say?

What Can I Say?
I'm interested in almost everything. Use to like to travel, but it's too expensive now. I take Tai Chi classes, swim, volunteer in a Jump-start program for pre-schoolers. I'm an avid reader and like nearly everyone these days I follow politics avidly. I'm a former teacher and Special Projects Coordinator for a Telecommunications company, Assistant to the President of a Japanese silicon wafer manufacturing company. Am now enjoying retirement -- most of the time. I have two daughters, one son-in-law and two sons scattered all over the country. No grandchildren.

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