Repairing hearts
A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a
Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop.
The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to
come and take a look at his bike.
The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey, Doc, can
I ask you a question?"
The surgeon a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic
working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a
rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take the
valves out, fix 'em, put 'em back in, and when I finish, it works just like
new. So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks,
when you and I are doing basically the same work?"
The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to
the mechanic...
"Try doing it with the engine running."
******************************
An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting
surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the
operation. As he was about to get the anesthesia, he asked to speak to his son.
"Yes, Dad, what is it?"
"Don't be nervous, son; do your best, and just
remember, if it doesn't go well, if something happens to me, your mother is
going to come and live with you and your wife...."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aging:
Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about
your age and start bragging about it. This is so true. I love to hear them say
"you don't look that old..."
------------------------------
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in
line for.
------------------------------
Some people try to turn back their odometers.
Not me! I want people to know why I look this way.
I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't
paved.
********************
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to
youth, think of Algebra.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You know you are getting old when everything either... dries
up or leaks.
First you forget names, then you forget faces.
Then you forget to pull up your zipper.... it's worse when
you forget...to pull it down.
Two guys, one old, one young, are pushing their carts around
WalMart when they collide.
The old guy says to the young guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife, and I guess
I wasn't paying attention to where I was going."
The young guy says, "That's OK, it's a coincidence. I'm
looking for my wife, too... I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate."
The old guy says, "Well, maybe I can help you find
her... what does she look like?"
The young guy says, "Well, she is 27 yrs. old, tall,
with red hair, blue eyes, is buxom wearing no bra, long legs, and is wearing
short shorts. What does your wife look like?
To which the old guy says, "Doesn't matter, --- let's
look for yours."
*********************
"Lord, keep Your arm around my shoulder and Your hand
over my mouth!"
11 comments:
I may have to remember (some of!) these!
Cheers - Stewart M - Melbourne
I didn't just giggle Sylvia, I laughed out loud, haha. These are all funny and true LOL.
Have a nice week.
Hahaha! You little devil you Sylvia :)
Everyone is such a laugh, Sylvia. Thanks for your regular visits to and comments on my blog. I'm having Internet issues and often can't get onto other blogs to comment. Have a great day. Jo
Thanks for making me smile, Sylvia!
haha. i like the heart surgeon one.
Hari OM
...and again nearly fell from chair... nothing to do with the years (ahem)! YAM xx
"The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for."
That is so true!
I love it when you make me laugh Sylvia! Thanks!
Have you the one about the doctor calling the plumber about his clogged-up drains? The plumber said: "Throw two Aspirins into the toilet and call me in the morning if it isn't any better".
Not quite up to your standard :-)
I think that young guy needs more help looking for his wife. I'll be right there.
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