1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A
JOB WELL DONE .
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL .
" If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4.. My mother taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9 My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA..
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING ..
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE..
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me.."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS..
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
And last but not least!
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.
Sylvia's world in thoughts and pictures
I miss you Sam!!
I miss you Sam!!
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What Can I Say?
I'm interested in almost everything. Use to like to travel, but it's too expensive now. I take Tai Chi classes, swim, volunteer in a Jump-start program for pre-schoolers. I'm an avid reader and like nearly everyone these days I follow politics avidly. I'm a former teacher and Special Projects Coordinator for a Telecommunications company, Assistant to the President of a Japanese silicon wafer manufacturing company. Am now enjoying retirement -- most of the time. I have two daughters, one son-in-law and two sons scattered all over the country. No grandchildren.
11 comments:
Hilarious! All of them are gems! Love it.
Sylvia,
I just stopped drinking my tea, I was laughing so much. What a way to start the morning. (wed morning here)....Thank you for posting these..
Love the first one, so funny. :D
a treasure trove!
Hello, ooh now thats a good, I would not mind putting a link to your post about this in my blog, hope thats ok, this is so true..have a fab day :) cya MonikaAROse
I just found your blog through Thunder from a Quiet Storm and love your funny and touching posts. And you live in Seattle! I just came back from a visit there where I fell totally in love with the place - Top Pot, the public market, the food, the Mariners, the views, the clean streets - the coffee!!! Great city, and a great blog!
and wonderful lessons they are!
I LOVE this! Hilarious but so true!
I just love it and a lot of it rings true about my own mother. More mothers should use this as a guide today! Funny.
Hullo Sylvia, I'm just popping in to see who you are before I email you privately.
I love this collection.
I think mothers are universal as my mother told me quite a few of your sayings, but they were in French, like “eat your spinach… “manges tes épinards… and I think I said a few myself to my daughters – the circle is unbroken!
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