I miss you Sam!!

I miss you Sam!!
I miss you Sam!!

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Dear Abby -- Help!

DEAR ABBY ADMITTED SHE WAS AT A LOSS
TO ANSWER THE FOLLOWING:

Dear Abby,
A couple of women moved in across the hall from me.
One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a
social worker in her mid twenties. These two women
go everywhere together and I've never seen a man
go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they
could be Lebanese?


Dear Abby,
What can I do about all the Sex,
Nudity, Fowl Language and Violence
on my VCR?


Dear Abby,
I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much,
I'm not even sure the baby I'm carrying is his.


Dear Abby,
I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman
who has been on the pill for two years. It's
getting expensive and I think my boyfriend
should share half the cost, but I don't know
him well enough to discuss money with him.

Dear Abby,
I've suspected that my husband
has been fooling around, and
when confronted with the
evidence, he denied everything
and said it would never
happen again.


Dear Abby,
Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a
boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn
against his own?

Dear Abby,
I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it.
Now how do I get out?


Dear Abby,
My forty-year old son has been paying a psychiatrist
$50.00 an hour every week for two and a half years.
He must be crazy..

Dear Abby,
I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't
know he drank until one night he came home sober.

Dear Abby,
My mother is mean and short tempered.
I think she is going through mental pause.

Dear Abby,
You told some woman whose husband had lost all
interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my
husband lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor.
Now what do I do?


Remember these people can vote!!

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

ROFLMAO!!! These are just hysterical. Aren't people just stupid? It's scary LOL Happy Valentine's Day to you and your family and Gung Hay Fat Choy :)

Jonny Hamachi said...

HAhhahaha.

Thanks for that!

SandyCarlson said...

Those were lots and lots of fun, Sylvia!

Loran said...

Very funny! I happen to be suffering from mental pause too.

SquirrelQueen said...

Hmmm, I find myself at a loss for words as well. Those are way too funny.

Vicki ~ FL said...

OMG....it's no wonder Abby didn't know what to say to these "people"! I too would be at a loss for words.

But you did make my day, Sylvia!

Gattina said...

Hahaha ! Even I would be short on answers ! It's a good idea of sharing the costs of "The" pill ! A pity that I didn't know it when I took it !:)

Nessa said...

I'm speechless. But they are clueless.

Desires

Janie said...

I love these! Our dearest Abby must have laughed a lot.

Anonymous said...

These were hilarious, Sylvia - thanks!

What Can I Say?

What Can I Say?
I'm interested in almost everything. Use to like to travel, but it's too expensive now. I take Tai Chi classes, swim, volunteer in a Jump-start program for pre-schoolers. I'm an avid reader and like nearly everyone these days I follow politics avidly. I'm a former teacher and Special Projects Coordinator for a Telecommunications company, Assistant to the President of a Japanese silicon wafer manufacturing company. Am now enjoying retirement -- most of the time. I have two daughters, one son-in-law and two sons scattered all over the country. No grandchildren.

Portland Time