I miss you Sam!!

I miss you Sam!!
I miss you Sam!!

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

What Confuscious Did Not Say .......


I have a wonderful lady friend who is 87 and she keeps me supplied with side splitters! She does have a delightfully wicked sense of humor. I thought I would share some of it today!

Man who wants pretty nurse, must be  patient.
    Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing  of fly.
    Lady who goes camping must beware of evil  intent.
    Squirrel who runs up woman's leg will not find  nuts.
    Man who leaps off cliff jumps to  conclusion.
    Man who runs in front of car gets tired, man who  runs behind car gets exhausted.
    Man who eats many prunes get good run for  money.
    War does not determine who is right, it determines  who is left.
    Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at  night.
    It takes many nails to build a crib but only one  screw to fill it.
    Man who drives like hell is bound to get  there.
    Man who stands on toilet is high on  pot.
    Man who live in glass house should change clothes  in basement.
    Man who fish in other man's well often catch  crabs.
    Finally CONFUCIUS DID SAY. . ...
    "A lion will not cheat on his wife, but a Tiger  Wood!"
And one last smile!

12 comments:

Linda Reeder said...

Someone is very punny, and funny!

Suz said...

87? hee hee....I love her
and that kitty picture...pure crackup

Nature Rambles said...

Thanks for the chuckle!;)

Dianne said...

of course I love the kitten most :)

Al said...

Funny, and what a cute kitten!

Genie -- Paris and Beyond said...

Great funnies, and that kitten is precious. I do not think that kitty stayed there for very long before scampering up a wall - hah!

Like your new template, but you knew I would, mon amie...

Bises,
Genie

George said...

I didn't know Confucius was so funny. Thanks for all the smiles.

SandyCarlson said...

I needed these laughs. Thank you!

Hildred and Charles said...

Gosh, I'm 87 and nobody ever told me all these funny sayings...I'm glad you finally did Sylvia.

Kay said...

Oh too funny, Sylvia! Thank you for the MANY laughs! It really perked up my evening.

PerthDailyPhoto said...

I love that she still has such a great sense of humour at 87, I hope I do too I think it's what keeps you young. Thanks Sylvia, a good chuckle!

Genie said...

Your skies are more than just pretty this week. They are really pretty. The third one has to be my favorite. It is heavenly...but then that is an appropriate adjective when using the work. heavenly. genie

What Can I Say?

What Can I Say?
I'm interested in almost everything. Use to like to travel, but it's too expensive now. I take Tai Chi classes, swim, volunteer in a Jump-start program for pre-schoolers. I'm an avid reader and like nearly everyone these days I follow politics avidly. I'm a former teacher and Special Projects Coordinator for a Telecommunications company, Assistant to the President of a Japanese silicon wafer manufacturing company. Am now enjoying retirement -- most of the time. I have two daughters, one son-in-law and two sons scattered all over the country. No grandchildren.

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