A friend sent this to me and as I read it, I realized just how much truth there was to it. I have, slowly I'll confess, come to value my life as it is now, as I am now and I thought I'd share some of these thoughts with you.
I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.
I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.
Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60 &70's, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love ... I will.
I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set.
They, too, will get old. I know I am sometimes forgetful.
But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.
Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.
I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.
As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.
So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day(if I feel like it).
So, take another look at your life now and see if you can find the same joyous things that I have found in mine. Now, having said that, please know that I can still have a "bad hair day" now and then, times when I have to sit down and re-read all of the above and remind myself of just how much I have to be thankful and grateful for. I hope it works for you, too!
Sylvia's world in thoughts and pictures
I miss you Sam!!
I miss you Sam!!
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What Can I Say?
I'm interested in almost everything. Use to like to travel, but it's too expensive now. I take Tai Chi classes, swim, volunteer in a Jump-start program for pre-schoolers. I'm an avid reader and like nearly everyone these days I follow politics avidly. I'm a former teacher and Special Projects Coordinator for a Telecommunications company, Assistant to the President of a Japanese silicon wafer manufacturing company. Am now enjoying retirement -- most of the time. I have two daughters, one son-in-law and two sons scattered all over the country. No grandchildren.
12 comments:
I, too, feel OK about getting older except for all the health issues that suddenly arise. I'm afraid I do still worry about what people think of me...maybe not as much as I used to but I do still let it hurt me sometimes. Sigh. Maybe that's why I'm so drawn to Helen and Margaret. She sticks to her guns and doesn't seem to let others hurt her. I'm in awe of that.
That was beautifully written Sylvia. You are so right, many people's lives get cut short. Loved this so much I am printing it out to keep. There needs to be more posts about the positives of aging. You are an inspiration! Accpetance is a great thing and doing it your way is even better still.
way to go!!
this is a gem of a post!!
Wow, Sylvia. Posting that will bless a lot of people! Thanks!
Sometimes I love a blog post so much, that I bookmark. If it's really special, I print it so that after it's forgotten I can come across it again as a pleasant surprise.
This one's printing as I type this, and when I finish, I'm going looking for a *frame*. That's a first!
I love my grey hair...though must admit I might trade a *few* friends for a flatter belly! LOL
I agree with you. There is some comfort in not getting caught up in all that is not so important. Thanks for the reminder. I always enjoy your post!
Great post. I too do not mind getting old. My hair is not grey because of the beautician but my face shows signs of my age. After all, I just had my 73rd birthday!
I am so fortunate...I have no health problems and take no meds.
That was the best part for me - the freeing up. I first noticed it in my latter 40s, and it's gotten better and freer ever since!
At 65, I go in spurts as to how I feel about the aging process. I have read a lot of positive thoughts on it but think part of accepting it is-- just accepting it. When I was younger, I was free to sometimes be depressed or not like some aspect of my life, I think we should give ourselves that same freedom now. I wish I could get to where I didn't care that aging is changing my face and body, but I care. I just remind myself of the alternative and that definitely is not appealing. I also think how lucky I am to get to experience this as so many do not live to get the gray hair and wrinkles.
So I am trying to live it fully. Not deny what I am feeling or experiencing but also not let it be the end all be all of who I am. There is much we can do as elders which does have advantages, as the words above attest. It's not all good or bad. It is just what it is.
interesting thoughts and i agree with you. the challenge is when health issues limit your life but there are always in worse condition than yourself. too many people my age 68 complain all the time about health problems...it's easy to fall into. but life is a great teacher if we accept it's lessons.
you're a force of nature - hope you know that
Thanks Sylvia for the reminder that getting older can be a great thing to look forward to!
I plan on getting a lot older myself!
I so agree. I've earned every gray hair and wrinkle
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